Sora is the final Super Smash Bros. DLC character and I’m eating crow

Almost exactly a year ago, when Nintendo announced that October 1st will be the day they start revealing the characters for the final cluster of DLC characters for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate I wrote an article. It, admittedly, wasn’t my best articles but I stood by it for almost a full year. In this article, which will be forever at this URL so people can rub my face in it, I stated the reasons why Sora could/would/should never be in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate.

I made three points. One was a joke. One was something that was proven yesterday. And one was something that is still true but Nintendo clearly can deal with.

But yup. October 5th, 2021, Nintendo just went ahead and announced Sora.

In reverse order, I’m going to just bring up the three points I made in that article.

His story would be a nightmare

This was the joke one. I made a joke about how if they did an accurate single-player story mode for him, it would require a moment where the final third of the story mode required you to wait around a decade for it to unlock.

It was a joke and I will still stand by that because I find the insane gaps between Kingdom Heart games hilarious for games that came out as midland as they were.

He’d be an aerial nightmare

The second point I made was that if you were going to make Sora accurate he’d be an absolute obnoxious roadblock to any opponent that made the mistake of leaving the ground. In the Kingdom Heart games, Sora spends half his time in the air with his fall mysteriously halted whenever he swings about that giant key.

You can make fun of me for that article all you want but you can’t deny the fact that this turned out to be true. They even mentioned in the Nintendo Direct that he’s got combos that can be done in the air and would be an interesting deterrent to other aerial fighters.

He’d be a licensing nightmare

Disney is somehow worth even more than it was last year thanks in part to us completely ignoring anti-trust laws and allowing Disney to own whatever they damn well please. And as Disney grows, so too goes their licensing fees.

And yet, despite what should have been the biggest hurdle, especially for the 86th character in a game already swamped with licensed characters, they not only still went ahead with this but showed the famous Disney three-circles logo, the Mickey silhouette, first and foremost before ANYTHING else in Sora’s reveal trailer.

The most expensive logo to use, on Earth, period, just displayed front row center for fighter number 86.

And I’m not just saying that. In a ranking of the most expensive companies to license, Disney towers over the second-place company by THIRTY BILLION DOLLARS. Not only that, but for the English version of Sora, they’ve already confirmed that Haley Joel Osment will be reprising the role for this. Like…they’re bringing in HJO to basically yell the names of six spells and grunt. This was a major financial flex on Nintendo’s part and maybe, potentially, the most expensive (to the company) DLC add-on of all time.

So yes, I’m definitely eating crow for that damned article I wrote but I still stand by my reason, especially considering they could have paid absolutely nothing for Waluigi, a character THEY ALREADY OWN.

Anywho, comment section, let’s get this out of your systems.